“Firstly, I don’t like people much” says Shane then goes on about how he gets annoyed with peoples’ shopping etiquette. He secretly wishes he could do all his shopping on Takealot. I completely get him though. How many times have you been in a queue at the supermarket and have someone breathing down your neck. You feel awkward and move slightly forward hoping that they will get the subtle message to give you some space. This move, however, is often  interpreted as an opportunity for them to move closer to you again.

I must admit I’ve come to a point where I say PLEASE BACK OFF. Okay, not in so many words because I’m generally very polite, but I do tell the person that they are in my space and kindly ask them to move back slightly.

So Shane then goes on and says: “What about when people start moving your groceries on the conveyor belt at the cashier” and we all suddenly burst into laughter. We can all relate to this. This random person behind you in the queue thinks its okay to just move your groceries along in order to make space for their items. Why do people do this? It’s like going to a public toilet and have strangers roll off some toilet paper for you so you can move along swiftly.

Worse than the conveyor belt etiquette, according to Thabiet, is something that he’s guilty of The Trolley Terror! No matter how empty or full the supermarket is, some trolley drivers just don’t keep that Safe Following Distance. They hit the Achilles tendon once, then say “sorry” and hit it again and pretend it was your fault the second time and offer no apology. You meanwhile, turnaround to glare at the culprit, wishing you could utter obscenities but are reminded that your 6 year old child is with you and you are in a public space.

Today’s lesson: “Kissing the back of someone’s neck is a very sensual thing to do….unless you now do it to a stranger in the queue at Pick n Pay” -Jokes of the Cape, Facebook

Image by Duane Hanson









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